Aloha Oy

Just back from Hawaii.

Must get some sleep.

One thing is for sure: travelling with TWO ain't twice as hard as travelling with one. It's much much worse.

Especially when children get diseased at different points in the vacation.

Zzzz...

House of Sand and Snot

So lately Michael has been playing in the sandbox...

FOUR MONTHS that kid has been going to preschool, and only NOW does he discover that big pile of sand on the playground??? The unfortunate thing is that sand is one of those things that can only be brushed off when it's in the most inappropriate place...say, like our brand new minivan.

Or his bed. Yes, I discovered sand all over his bed the other day. I guess I didn't thoroughly brush him off before naptime. People pay oodles of money to have their bodies exfoliated with granules of sugar or the like, but my kid is getting it for free in his construction truck sheets.

So, for those of you who have just started the child-rearing or are planning to:

There comes an age when you must strip your child down to his undies in the garage every time you come home from an outing. That age is when he discovers the sandbox. And even then, you'll still want to double check the undies...

I think our garage door is almost like beachfront property sometimes...

I'd strip Michael in the backyard, only, baby, it's cold outside. 'Tis the season for perpetual runny noses as well. And one of those weird, OCD things that mothers develop is the obsession with keeping their children's nasal passages clear. Nothing is more annoying to a mother than one of those green boogies just on the edge of the nostril. You know, the ones that wave in and out as the child struggles to breathe through his snot-crusted nose. We've been having lots of those around here, and as Michael is so generous with his little brother, Alex has developed some waving-in-the-wind type boogies as well.

The tools we use for excavation:
Kleenex (wring a corner into a Q-tip shape technique) - Appropriate, after all, that is what Kleenex is for. Downside, not a lot of control and not stiff enough to really dig. You end up just sort of twirling it around inside the poor kid's nose, and if you're lucky, something will stick to it and come out.

Q-tip - Incredible precision and control completely negated by huge wad of cotton. Add to that the danger factor (that .0000000000001% chance that you're going to get bumped in the back by a runaway shopping cart full of detergent which will cause you to force the Q-tip up the kid's nose and into his right lobe.) Not recommended.

Bulb - A parent's favorite, a child's nightmare. My logic - "It's the absolute reverse of blowing his nose!!!" Usually can see results as well (which you need to empty into a Kleenex). The child, unfortunately, has to suffer through the sensation of getting his eyeballs sucked out through his nose. Add to that the fact that usually parents are manic/obsessive about using this, it makes for a bad experience overall ("One more suction, that'll get that congestion I hear way way way way up there!")

And the one that affords the most control, the most precision, and the biggest ick factor...

Pinkie nail!

I'm just telling it like it is, folks. You know you've done it. You just don't want to admit it.

HaHA!

Dynamic Duo 4
Originally uploaded by fujimoo.

Okay. Just had to post two things.

A funny pic of the dynamic duo...and what the whole Santa experience really is like...

wilbanks - ' wil - ba[ng]ks v. To stare with wide eyes, in a manner like Jennifer Wilbanks'. Not necessarily indicative of jilting or fake-your-own-abduction tendencies.



Note: The second image is actually Michael's wilbanksin' moment caught on film, at seven months. Alex...well, let's just say that the baby was almost born astonished. Ahh, the wide-eyed innocence of youth...

Four months out

Something nobody tells you about after the baby arrives...

You start shedding the massive quantities of beautiful, full, lustrous hair you built up during your pregnancy. I guess Mother Nature figured that if your mate isn't going to run away and abandon you before the four month mark, he's probably going to be a good provider and stick around to help feed the new little milk-guzzler. So what's a little bit of hair loss? If sleep deprivation and postpartum hormonal swings didn't scare him off, nothing will...

...except for what I've swept off the bathroom floor. And the kitchen floor...and the entryway...

In other news, Michael is once again a free man. Madyson (yes, with a 'y') has apparently run off with CJ. He was very matter of fact about it-- "Madyson isn't married to me anymore. She married to CJ. Where's my umbrella?"

Parapluie is more important. And why not? I'm sure Madyson would do a terrible job keeping Michael dry in the rain.

Alex is possibly gaining teeth, which means that his capacity for drool has increased 400% in the past couple of weeks. Yet another bodily fluid I get to wipe up-- yay. With all the toxic substances (spitup/snot/pee/poop) that mothers have to deal with, I'm amazed that we couldn't just round up a bunch of moms with wipies to clean up after Chernobyl.

Okaaaaay, maybe it's not that bad.

But we've already gone through hair loss...